Dealing with Failure
Difficult yet not impossible. Also, a lot depends on what your perspective is towards success and failure. So, as of now, let’s think of it to be relative. What might be fascinating to me, might sound utterly ridiculous to another, and then perhaps we wouldn’t be quantifying success and failure like we are doing just now.
Well, just imagine anyone who has been continuously practising stoicism throughout his life, this is when he strives to hold pleasure and pain under the same dignity. In his heart, he feels that’s he is invincible, that no blows from the external world can scar him, but in reality he frets over silly blows that the world has to offer him.
How to get rid of this scenario? Does this make him any less of a good human? Is he not fulfilling his responsibilities, and gradually being vanquished in the process? Perhaps this is where despondency steps in, and he begins doubting himself. Matters get worse when this same person that considered himself to be indifferent towards every emotion, looks at every possible excuse now to avoid meeting people and encountering situations that make him vulnerable.
Yet, is there any solution to this? How can he keep pretending and holding on to false notions that promise things are going to work out eventually? Isn’t this some kind of shying away? Shying away and being a fugitive to oneself and one’s own emotions?
A column in a leading daily, The Times of India believes this behaviour and despondency to be the greatest virtue one can ever have. Startled? That was my case too until I started learning, introspecting and truly understanding what the write-up essentially meant.
It talked about such scenarios when truly confident people fumble, look back and begin feeling that they have somehow lost themselves in the entire process. Perhaps this is where an intervention is required. Same as what happened with Lord Rama in the Ramayan, and Arjuna in the Mahabharat. It has to be remembered that it was in their extremely chaotic state of mind that Rama and Arjuna had been given divine knowledge, and reminded of their duties and what did they needed to perform.
And, now to your chaotic self, that’s overanalysing every bout of success and failure, perhaps doing a SWOT analysis all over again. Please stop. Breathe. There’s a lot more to life than just fitting into societal standards. Also, both success and failures are impermanent. (Read up about Robert Downey Jr. or Jack Ma). It’ll come and go, but you can’t afford to lose yourself in the process.
They say failures are the pillars of success. Well, they are just determinants, and the next time you fail, just remember that all you have to do is just get up onto your feet, dust yourself a little, and walk along again…